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30 March 2003 @ 01:46 pm
Cleverness  
Whenever somebody tells me that I am clever, I want to punch them in the throat. Clever people will always be shat on, for the rest of time, by everyone they ever knew. People who get to be known as clever are ignored when people aren't in the mood for clever. People think being clever is great - the way people hang on your words, waiting to hear what you have to say next.

Guess what? The minute you have something to say that isn't clever, no matter how much it means to you, people stop paying attention to you. They wanted the clever, because that's all you are to them. Clever people stop being a friend to others and become a source of entertainment. And as soon as you can't be clever anymore, people forget who you are and leave you to die alone. As you get older, you realize that being clever is nice and all, but you wish people would actually try to connect to you. And they don't - because as clever as you might be, they never really gave a shit what kind of person you were - you were just very clever.

Nobody ever gets to know the clever person well, because why should they? What if you find out that they aren't really all that clever? What if they're just a pathetic loner who learned how to be clever because everybody else in school kept chanting "faggot" at them as they walked down the hallway, pissed on them in the locker room, and keyed their car. Nobody really cares who you are under the clever.

Somebody recently told me that I'm clever. If I'm clever, I would like to stop being clever as soon as possible.

Yeah - I get to say things that people tolerate for whatever reason, but nobody calls me to see how I'm doing. Nobody cares that I cry myself to sleep at night because I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life, and nobody cares how much it hurts to be the only single person in a crowded room.

But who the fuck am I to say that I'm clever? I'm just some fucking loser that became crass and anti-social and has all of this coming to him. It's easier to believe than anything else.

Microsoft Discovers New Integer Between 5 and 6
 
 
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