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06 March 2003 @ 04:29 pm
 
The principles of nuclear weapon safety and meeting girls are remarkably similar
If there were more people like you, there would be less people
ancient Scottish tradition of basing your food on a dare
Why I am going to pretend I am a girl online from now on
What level do we learn fireball?
I can't decide whether to change the world or just become a bitter recluse
Until today, it really pissed me off that I'd become this totally centered Zen Master and nobody had noticed
If someone wants to do something and it isn't hurting you...DON'T BE A FUCKING DICK
Reclusiveness is the key to ending the bitter frustration that consumes me whenever I think of the state of the world
What does having a girlfriend say to every other woman you know?
We've Replaced Your Freedom with the Illusion of Freedom
Denied an existence as beautiful and unique snowflakes
Napalm sticks to kids
How to properly assemble a combat insertion team
He may be a son-of-a-bitch, but he is our son-of-a-bitch
I felt a disturbance in the fun, as if a million playgrounds cried out, and then
Introducing yourself to the large-breasted woman
Introducing yourself to the small-breasted woman
Introducing yourself to the large-breasted man
My body is a battlefield, and all my breasts ever do is argue about existentialism
Her perception of how gorgeous she is will be evident in her lack of movement during sex
You need trepanation like you need another hole in your head
Grace and Fury walk with you, call each by name when the other has failed.
I stared into the muddled sky with tears running down my face in small rivers, and I knew then that there was no hope
The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!
That Little Bitch Marla Singer: A Cultural Critique of Sexism in Fight Club
I don't have any secrets. Now ask me if I have any lies.
Using a Jedi Mind Trick on State Troopers
She was a committed romantic and an anarcha-feminist. This was hard for her because it meant she couldn't blow up beautiful buildings.
How come there aren't any recreational suppositories?
---> Revelation of the Lamb in Four Parts <---
how to begin poetry
If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error
All I ever needed to know, I learned playing Dungeons and Dragons
It's illegal to bet money on sporting events, so we will gamble with the lives of innocent children
Imagine the prettiest thing you've ever seen. Now make it glow.
Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.