Dear The Lies of Locke Lamora,

Some time in the future, when you are parading yourself about the big screen in your new movie star glory, I will look back with regret and wonder at the awkward, sensuous weekend in late June of 2006 when I whiled away the hours as you made sweet love to my brain.

Next time, dinner and a movie.

I've been hurt by this sort of thing before.

Sincerely,

Doc