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27 February 2004 @ 12:20 pm
Alternative Friday Five - Feb 27, 2004  
Today is:
  • the anniversary of my step down to a half-dose of Effexor.
  • the last day for me being on the nicotine patch. Tomorrow I am patch-free, and I don't know how I feel about that.
  • the day that I realized the difference between "making amends" and "being sorry".
  • the day where I start taking responsibility for my own happiness, if I ever deserve such a thing.
  • the day where I accept my loneliness as a part of myself.
XCorvisxcorvis on February 27th, 2004 01:21 pm (UTC)
Yay for less drugs!
Doomutilitygeek on February 27th, 2004 01:30 pm (UTC)
I try to think less of lonliness as part of myself, so much as the fact that at this time, the flag "loneliness" is set for this instatiation of "person" known as "Doom". It may or may not be reset before the instatiation is deleted.
revxaos on February 27th, 2004 02:27 pm (UTC)
You only deserve happiness if you think you do.

At least, that's what a fortune cookie once told me.

And I always believe talking fortune cookies.
Josiah Carlsonchouyu_31 on February 28th, 2004 07:10 pm (UTC)
I think that being off of nicotine is a good thing, narcotics distributed by conglomerates are not good for you in any form.

In terms of "making amends" and "being sorry", which had you been doing?

Happiness and loneliness, depending on the person, are quite often not independant of each other. The trick is to decouple them and realize that first you need to live life for you. While this is happening, let friendship stave off the feeling of loneliness (because boy howdy, there are more than a handful of people who call you friend). When you are happy with yourself, you shouldn't need to find someone, someone just happens.
Parapluie dans la Rue de Parisscathach on February 29th, 2004 02:27 am (UTC)
I don't know, dude... I like the drugs. (twitch, twitch)

Seriously, this effexor's some good shit. I'm never gonna quit. (And if my brain chemistry has anything to say about it, I probably will never be able to. Ahhh.... the chemicals we add to our bodies to induce normalcy.)

You always deserved happiness, you wanker. It just took a big kick to the head to make you realize it. Now get out there and be happy!

And there's nothing wrong with a little lonliness, if it makes us more compassionate people. It's when you let it eat you up from the inside that it gets us in trouble. Try to maintain a little perspective on that part of it, and watch that you don't tip over the line. Remember, just because you're lonely doesn't mean that you're alone, and vice versa.