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22 May 2002 @ 02:43 am
Now is not a good time-  
for anything. I've spent the past week doing too much crap, moving too much crap. My nose is peeling like an orange from the commencement sun. I don't have a job, I'm at home in WIsconsin again (how do you make an emoticon for fuck you world!?), and the only way for me to access the internet is from dad's Winblowz ME machine. All of my keybindings are broken in Windows- any idea what it's like to sit down at a computer and be afraid to do anything fancy, in case you lose eveything you've been doing?

I thought only my grandma did that.

Depressed, again. Did NOT like AotC very much (agreeing more and more every day that Lucas is a hack), and nobody is around. No permanent residence yet, must scrape together money by selling things / begging parents in order to move into new place.

I realized yesterday that I have no shame. Not that it's impossible to embarass me - rather that I have no shame.

Quitting smoking didn't work, again. I need a job before I can do it and have it work. Was able to drive to St Paul and back from Park Falls without nervous breakdown. Plus.

Feel lonely in a crowd. Honesty accomplishes nothing in a world of deceit, so nobody believes me. Have not lied in a while, I think. Feel lonely by myself. Whoever she is (pick one), she doesn't care.
 
 
Current Music: Silence
 
 
 
la femme stygian: cutegunn on May 22nd, 2002 07:25 am (UTC)
I care, Docbaby! I was actually wondering last night whether you were still in town and if the number I had for you was the right one. Is there anything I can do from here for you?
The past is prologue: ratnemoren on May 22nd, 2002 08:49 am (UTC)
Dude, I wish you were still around. Ain't no one to hang out with at odd hours anymore.
Hillarysusanofstohelit on May 22nd, 2002 04:41 pm (UTC)
*hugs*

you have my sympathy.

if you wanted tom move to amery for the summer, I could see if my dad would hire you. I know you have lots of skills and he doesn't have a network guy, they might need a tech/grunt if you wanted. I'd be willing to ask him for you.

true keyboard suckage- since I dumped coffee into my laptop in january (that was a hideous week) the page up key goes randomly, highlighting and deleting everything I've typed. also makes browsing a pain.
lord and master of the broken childrenavatarofchaos on May 22nd, 2002 09:48 pm (UTC)
the anti-depressed fairy goes *BONK*
i'd say, perk up, but i know that doesn't work
i'd say, feel better, but that doesn't really work either
all i can say is you are not alone, silly, and plenty of people care. masses of people, in fact. and hell, if not masses, than a good dedicated few, which are all anyone needs.
*poke*
masui on May 23rd, 2002 09:44 am (UTC)
wow
angst